Hoeseph Hoestar

Hoeseph Hoestar, born Joseph Joestar, was birthed out of William Howard Taft's ear canal in 1918 after he had binge drunk 13 tons of tequila. Taft did not recall this, as he was drunk off his exceptionally large behind.

Due to his involvement with the President, he was taken in by the US Marines, where he was trained alongside Lonk PP Brendan to be an elite killing machine.

Several years later, Joseph, desperate to stop Kaiser Wilhelm from stealing Idaho, adopted the alter ego of Hoeseph Hoestar. He was able to seduce and then capture Kaiser Wilhelm, who was forced to abdicate and was painted green with permanent acrylic paint.

William Howard Taft noticed Hoeseph's deeds and took him under his blubbery wing, teaching him the art of Hamon. Joseph knew that Taft was his father, but couldn't tell him out of fear. He never told Taft, and when the Destruction Wave from Taft's death was spotted from Earth, Hoeseph cried for the first time in his life.